Hi Friends...Just last weekend I was rooting for the Giants to win against the Phillys. "Oh Please oh please oh please! Let this poor team who hasn't won since they've come to the beautiful bay area win!"
So they did. I celebrated with my first tasting of bourbon (it was my friend's 40th bday. He's a guy, so it's ok that we were watching the game during the party). I was excited and definitely looking forward to a great world series. Close, exciting, dramatic and rewarding. that's baseball....
Now, I'm an A's fan, a Bay Area fan and an American League fan in that order. I am thrilled the giants are in this and playing so well as a team and not just a one man army. But, to be honest, I'm torn. I am rooting for my guy, the former A's 3rd base coach guy, the man who should have been our new coach but instead our GM picks his best friend (and who is at the world series after what, 3 years?)guy...Ron Washington. I love Ron (who doesn't) and have for many years. so I'm torn people. t-o-r-n.
As i watched game 1 of the series i thought, fantastic. this is what we've been waiting for for so long! no yankees! no Angels! no Boston! two new teams full of hope, promise, excitment and history. but as I'm watching the 8th inning of this game two, I'm reminded of the feeling over the past few years. frustration, pitchers letting it get to them (zito, gonzalez, my poor duchscherererer, etc) and offensive not producing in key situations with men on base....gee, sounds sooo sooo familiar to me. why am i feeling this familiar knot in my top left side of my stomach. Oh, it's what i feel everytime I watch the A's. Ron Washington, will you ever break from this connection. I hope so my friend, I hope so. you deserve so much better than what is happening right now. wow...
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Finally slowing down...
Hi peeps,
It's been a crazy few months. There was a time when I was not able to live my life without feeling utterly and completely exhausted. I would tell myself to get going! There is no way I could possibly be tired after doing only one thing in a day and almost be in tears from being sooo tired if I attempted doing two things! Very frustrating!
I went to the doctor and she told me I had a fibroid the size of a pea that could be causing my exhaustion. So, I do all the prep work, asked around (seems that fibroids are normal and getting them removed - very common, like getting botox) and discovered that I could be ready to climb mountains and still have enough energy to have dinner and play a few games after this "procedure". I read books, talked to family and friends...I felt like I did my research and was actually excited to have the procedure. I took the two days off of work that I was told all was needed for recovery and still had the weekend to recuperate. Yes! I'd be ready to come back to work refreshed, rejuvenated, ready to go (there was a little bit of nerves the night before, but writing a quick letter to my family I felt 100 times better).
Anyway, I got to the hospital and the first thing my doctor says..."oh, in looking at your tests again, I discovered your fibroids are taking up 75% of your uterus. Its a good thing you weren't trying to have kids! It's no wonder you are completely exhausted, those things zap your iron levels! Ok, so everything will be fine. we'll see you on the other side!"
uh....WTF?!
After a hellacious recovery experience at the hospital (I wrote a letter to complain and had I not been throwing up would have gotten my IV'd butt out of my chair and smacked that b*tch nurse's phone out of her hand and told her to freakin' help me!), 4 days of "ugggh! mommy!" (I'll spare the details), and 4 emails and calls to my doctor, I ended up seeing someone else because I was so scared. The other doctor was not happy that I was told my initial time to recover was only two days... "do you realize your body is in shock? You had major surgery, not a procedure! You cannot be well after what you been through in 2 days! 2 weeks are more like it!"
Needless to say, I cried from that moment until I got back home because I was so relieved that I was ok and it was normal to be in so much pain and not be able to move easily. Baby, did I sleep after that! Two weeks to be exact! Only waking up to eat, shower and go to the bathroom. 3 weeks after surgery, I was finally going to work. The first couple weeks was exhausting. I took a 2 hour nap every day right when I got home then would eat and go to bed...and since then?
Since then, I've taken up working out twice a week, started playing on 3 softball teams and took a tennis class twice a week for 6 weeks. Every weekend I seem to have a booked schedule: wine tasting in napa and murphys, hiking half dome, softball tournaments, fitting in family obligations and trying to strengthen my relationships with close friends and new ones...it's only on Sunday evenings that I have my alone time. When my sister got married in Vegas and I believe I got a total of 12 hours of sleep in 3 days but still had energy to get to the pool, be social, and have a water gun fight. Phew! I'm back baby!!!!
Ladies, I fought to get tested for fibroids and fought to get them removed. I feel great now but it was a scary process getting to this point. Make sure you listen to your body and it gets what is needed to live a fulfilling life including time to recover.
I feel that I'm so busy and am a little thankful that I caught the flu, so I can actually rest and spend time by myself. It was a good 4 hours of somewhat silence today (laundry, vacuumed and now writing this blog). Finally! I can actually CHOOSE to be fast or slow versus trying to push myself to get through the day. After brunch with the girls then a quick jaunt to the Kite Festival today, tomorrow dinner and movies; Monday -hosting drinks then dinner with old friends; Tuesday - dinner with old coworkers and THEN I can start packing for my trip to Alaska that starts Saturday. Life is funny, and now I have the energy to laugh.
It's been a crazy few months. There was a time when I was not able to live my life without feeling utterly and completely exhausted. I would tell myself to get going! There is no way I could possibly be tired after doing only one thing in a day and almost be in tears from being sooo tired if I attempted doing two things! Very frustrating!
I went to the doctor and she told me I had a fibroid the size of a pea that could be causing my exhaustion. So, I do all the prep work, asked around (seems that fibroids are normal and getting them removed - very common, like getting botox) and discovered that I could be ready to climb mountains and still have enough energy to have dinner and play a few games after this "procedure". I read books, talked to family and friends...I felt like I did my research and was actually excited to have the procedure. I took the two days off of work that I was told all was needed for recovery and still had the weekend to recuperate. Yes! I'd be ready to come back to work refreshed, rejuvenated, ready to go (there was a little bit of nerves the night before, but writing a quick letter to my family I felt 100 times better).
Anyway, I got to the hospital and the first thing my doctor says..."oh, in looking at your tests again, I discovered your fibroids are taking up 75% of your uterus. Its a good thing you weren't trying to have kids! It's no wonder you are completely exhausted, those things zap your iron levels! Ok, so everything will be fine. we'll see you on the other side!"
uh....WTF?!
After a hellacious recovery experience at the hospital (I wrote a letter to complain and had I not been throwing up would have gotten my IV'd butt out of my chair and smacked that b*tch nurse's phone out of her hand and told her to freakin' help me!), 4 days of "ugggh! mommy!" (I'll spare the details), and 4 emails and calls to my doctor, I ended up seeing someone else because I was so scared. The other doctor was not happy that I was told my initial time to recover was only two days... "do you realize your body is in shock? You had major surgery, not a procedure! You cannot be well after what you been through in 2 days! 2 weeks are more like it!"
Needless to say, I cried from that moment until I got back home because I was so relieved that I was ok and it was normal to be in so much pain and not be able to move easily. Baby, did I sleep after that! Two weeks to be exact! Only waking up to eat, shower and go to the bathroom. 3 weeks after surgery, I was finally going to work. The first couple weeks was exhausting. I took a 2 hour nap every day right when I got home then would eat and go to bed...and since then?
Since then, I've taken up working out twice a week, started playing on 3 softball teams and took a tennis class twice a week for 6 weeks. Every weekend I seem to have a booked schedule: wine tasting in napa and murphys, hiking half dome, softball tournaments, fitting in family obligations and trying to strengthen my relationships with close friends and new ones...it's only on Sunday evenings that I have my alone time. When my sister got married in Vegas and I believe I got a total of 12 hours of sleep in 3 days but still had energy to get to the pool, be social, and have a water gun fight. Phew! I'm back baby!!!!
Ladies, I fought to get tested for fibroids and fought to get them removed. I feel great now but it was a scary process getting to this point. Make sure you listen to your body and it gets what is needed to live a fulfilling life including time to recover.
I feel that I'm so busy and am a little thankful that I caught the flu, so I can actually rest and spend time by myself. It was a good 4 hours of somewhat silence today (laundry, vacuumed and now writing this blog). Finally! I can actually CHOOSE to be fast or slow versus trying to push myself to get through the day. After brunch with the girls then a quick jaunt to the Kite Festival today, tomorrow dinner and movies; Monday -hosting drinks then dinner with old friends; Tuesday - dinner with old coworkers and THEN I can start packing for my trip to Alaska that starts Saturday. Life is funny, and now I have the energy to laugh.
Friday, June 11, 2010
The birthday bash with a little class (from my friends)
can it be?! it's been awhile dear followers i know, but can it be that I'm now 39 years old and managed to stay young and fabulous? i was not looking forward to this year's birthday celebration...feeling a little blue not because of the age thing but eh, sometimes it's just the way it is. my friend gently reminded me that last year and the year before i didn't celebrate either. before then i would plan weekend extravaganzas with several options to celebrate around the bay area, but now...not so much. what is it? what's the deal? get over it sister! and I did, i had a really nice birthday weekend. Dinner with friends new and old, sex in the city (the movie...the m-o-v-i-e)the next evening, drinks, dinner and dancing with co-workers, and ended with a korean body scrub and BBQ. what a great birthday! what i learned was sometimes your friends, your real friends, know just what to say when it needs to be said. My dear friend said, yay! it's your birthday what are we doing? and when i said nothing she said, no, we did that last year. Let's get this party started! and even though i was exhausted, i'm so happy. I've got good friends who come through with the little things that end up meaning so much more. life has it's ups and downs but it's your friends that see you through to make sure there is more up then down and that's life in the fast/slow lane. Kisses!
Thursday, January 7, 2010
**
Hi all,
it has been a long time but it's definitely been a year of fast and slow situations....wouldn't you agree? let's try and stay focused on the new and the positive shall we?
so for this year i'm committed to 3 things...
1. health - working out, eating right, making and following through on doctor appts..
2. dating - i am going to commit to a dating site and joining new social networks
3. finding a new job - i am sick of myself talking about my sh*tty a** job. i'm sure so are all of you (although, some i suspect, really enjoy the sick humor). Hell, if i wasn't living it i would think this was some hilarious stuff (fyi - the staff person who had a prostitute on staff and stole oven doors may be coming back). I've been saying...amy poelher's show has nothing on what i experience on a daily basis. if anyone knows a writer for her show...send them to me. :)
so, any ideas that you have for your life in 2010??? any suggestions or tips for me???
it has been a long time but it's definitely been a year of fast and slow situations....wouldn't you agree? let's try and stay focused on the new and the positive shall we?
so for this year i'm committed to 3 things...
1. health - working out, eating right, making and following through on doctor appts..
2. dating - i am going to commit to a dating site and joining new social networks
3. finding a new job - i am sick of myself talking about my sh*tty a** job. i'm sure so are all of you (although, some i suspect, really enjoy the sick humor). Hell, if i wasn't living it i would think this was some hilarious stuff (fyi - the staff person who had a prostitute on staff and stole oven doors may be coming back). I've been saying...amy poelher's show has nothing on what i experience on a daily basis. if anyone knows a writer for her show...send them to me. :)
so, any ideas that you have for your life in 2010??? any suggestions or tips for me???
Friday, April 3, 2009
can it really be that time???!
why do we do this to ourselves...i'm exhausted every morning and at 3pm. i go to my starbucks and order a tall soy chai...cold weather = hot; hot weather = iced and carry on with my day...6pm I'm again ready to fall asleep but I try to push through with either exercise or something social. 9 pm things start to pick up...i'm a little hyper and think...should I go to the gym, read a book, watch more reality tv or get online....next thing i know its 12:30 am and i'm like what the eff??? i've got to go to bed! I have an early morning meeting! I change, wash my face, brush my teeth, hug the cat, play a few games of mah jong on my ps2 and turn off the light. Right before I'm in the dark I catch the last glimpse of the time...2 am sh*t.... that's life in the fastslow lane.
Friday, February 20, 2009
The reality is...
I am a reality show junkie...somebody help me! so I figured out my schedule today...
monday -the city, daddy's girls;
tuesday, american idol,
wednesday - top chef;
thursday - america's best dance crew;
friday - nothing!, ok, maybe bad tv movies
saturday/sunday - ANTM reruns...
I'm waiting for project runway and the new ANTM to start then my schedule will be c-r-a-z-y! how sad is that? Oh god, is this really my life?! I said H-e-l-l-n-a-h! so I made a new schedule:
monday - yoga (with straps?), then run home to watch the city ONLY
tuesday - gym for pilates, no tv but read
wednesday - i signed up for guitar class, then run over to watch ANTM
thursday - softball (when season starts) or gym for weights, no tv go to bed
friday rest/social night, I better have a date sometime soon
saturday - softball (til season ends) or run/walk the lake or take balinese dance, friend time
sunday - tango classes, friend time
so, my reality is i don't do well with time on my hands, i need to be scheduled...then only my social calendar suffers and i'm no longer spontaneous! :( where's the balance? i guess I'll figure that out later but I'm super excited that I have a whole new schedule that involves moving my booty up and off the couch! after I finish the chocolate donuts...OH! and finish this blog (i'm on the chair not the couch writing this...that's different isn't it?)
kisses to you all!
monday -the city, daddy's girls;
tuesday, american idol,
wednesday - top chef;
thursday - america's best dance crew;
friday - nothing!, ok, maybe bad tv movies
saturday/sunday - ANTM reruns...
I'm waiting for project runway and the new ANTM to start then my schedule will be c-r-a-z-y! how sad is that? Oh god, is this really my life?! I said H-e-l-l-n-a-h! so I made a new schedule:
monday - yoga (with straps?), then run home to watch the city ONLY
tuesday - gym for pilates, no tv but read
wednesday - i signed up for guitar class, then run over to watch ANTM
thursday - softball (when season starts) or gym for weights, no tv go to bed
friday rest/social night, I better have a date sometime soon
saturday - softball (til season ends) or run/walk the lake or take balinese dance, friend time
sunday - tango classes, friend time
so, my reality is i don't do well with time on my hands, i need to be scheduled...then only my social calendar suffers and i'm no longer spontaneous! :( where's the balance? i guess I'll figure that out later but I'm super excited that I have a whole new schedule that involves moving my booty up and off the couch! after I finish the chocolate donuts...OH! and finish this blog (i'm on the chair not the couch writing this...that's different isn't it?)
kisses to you all!
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
can i get a woo hoo?!
ok party people, it's been an up and down and back up again kind of year and it's only february! I think as we get older the desire to stay in control over our lives is more apparent but so is the reality that it ain't gonna happen! there are too many people that cross our path that change the direction just a weeeeeeee bit or crash into us and turn us around 180 degrees. but, i'm here to say, stay true to your course and you'll find your way back despite all the twists. for instance, i work at this crazy place...and i mean c-r-a-z-y. I'm not joking, my ex - boss should be in a hospital. anyway, i'm racing around in my car trying to take a short cut to the office quickly when all of a sudden i'm completely lost and at a dead end road scared out of my wits. it's scary where i work and no joke at 10 in the morning i discovered my spiritual side and prayed like hell to get me back on to the main road.
my point is i saw the street I needed to get to, it was a block away (a very loooong block mind you), but i kept my eye on the prize and got there in one piece. ever since then I don't stray to take the easy way back to the office, i stay on course not caring if it takes an extra 5 minutes. so, as in this scenario, i'm trying to stay focused on the prize, to get a freakin new job obviously but most importantly, to stay true to myself and not try to take the easy way or the "quickest" way but to work on getting there in one piece.
think back to a time when you were completely happy. a time when you could honestly say, shooot, if I died today I would die happy. I've had a couple of those moments, one where I thought I was going to drown but was completely at peace with it and you know...it was fantastic. I was free to be spontaneous in my personal life while working in or towards an inspirational career - one that contributes to society in a positive way, one that makes me want to be a better person, a better citizen, one that allows me to survive and pay this mortgage...
When I first started my current job and as the months turned into a year and now I'm staring at a year and a half of being in a fog, being crashed into and turned around 180 degrees...I'm starting to see the light. I'm moving towards what I want, being more confident in myself remembering what it was that makes me...well, me!
what have I been doing? well, I'm starting to remember that moment stuck under raft, the moment I ran my first job as a small business owner, the day i graduated from grad school, the day I climbed up a 30 foot tree and jumped off to try and hit a volleyball tied on a string...these moments are clear and they happened because I moved, i stayed focused, i stopped talking about it and actually did something. while I'm not quite ready to die and be happy about it, I'm moving back to the feeling of being alive!
So peeps, get up off the couch, turn off the tv (and your computer) and go outside. get exercise, fresh air, have the rain, snow, sleet or sun hit your face take a deep breath and appreciate you are alive and can feel. do something different and on a whim. even if it's for an hour take the time to appreciate your surroundings and you'll find that your much closer to staying on your path, to finding the light at the end of the tunnel, to turning back around and picking yourself up and heading back to what you want...your thoughts are clear, you spirit is rejuvenated...your ready to get it going! do it and let me know how it went! can i get a woo!hoo!
my point is i saw the street I needed to get to, it was a block away (a very loooong block mind you), but i kept my eye on the prize and got there in one piece. ever since then I don't stray to take the easy way back to the office, i stay on course not caring if it takes an extra 5 minutes. so, as in this scenario, i'm trying to stay focused on the prize, to get a freakin new job obviously but most importantly, to stay true to myself and not try to take the easy way or the "quickest" way but to work on getting there in one piece.
think back to a time when you were completely happy. a time when you could honestly say, shooot, if I died today I would die happy. I've had a couple of those moments, one where I thought I was going to drown but was completely at peace with it and you know...it was fantastic. I was free to be spontaneous in my personal life while working in or towards an inspirational career - one that contributes to society in a positive way, one that makes me want to be a better person, a better citizen, one that allows me to survive and pay this mortgage...
When I first started my current job and as the months turned into a year and now I'm staring at a year and a half of being in a fog, being crashed into and turned around 180 degrees...I'm starting to see the light. I'm moving towards what I want, being more confident in myself remembering what it was that makes me...well, me!
what have I been doing? well, I'm starting to remember that moment stuck under raft, the moment I ran my first job as a small business owner, the day i graduated from grad school, the day I climbed up a 30 foot tree and jumped off to try and hit a volleyball tied on a string...these moments are clear and they happened because I moved, i stayed focused, i stopped talking about it and actually did something. while I'm not quite ready to die and be happy about it, I'm moving back to the feeling of being alive!
So peeps, get up off the couch, turn off the tv (and your computer) and go outside. get exercise, fresh air, have the rain, snow, sleet or sun hit your face take a deep breath and appreciate you are alive and can feel. do something different and on a whim. even if it's for an hour take the time to appreciate your surroundings and you'll find that your much closer to staying on your path, to finding the light at the end of the tunnel, to turning back around and picking yourself up and heading back to what you want...your thoughts are clear, you spirit is rejuvenated...your ready to get it going! do it and let me know how it went! can i get a woo!hoo!
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